"give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o’er-fraught heart and bids it break."-shakespeare
definitely dealing with this lately.
grief comes hand in hand with guilt..
i should have, could have done more, said more, been more.. and now there’s no taking anything back. there’s never going to be anything i can do to make it up or fix it.
"For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way. Something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life."-alfred d’souza
i feel like nothing matters anymore, nothing is worth it. or should everything matter that much more because nothing is promised, no one has tomorrow for sure.
there’s so much shit going on that none of the littler things in life seem to hold any weight anymore. i used to enjoy looking forward to going out dancing or grabbing tea with a friend, or shopping with my sisters, or cooking. now it feels almost like a waste of time or just unimportant. what happened to that feeling that all the little things make life worth living?
maybe i’m just wrecked with guilt and stress and worry and responsibility and there’s not even time to be sad. i’ve been chucked into the position of bread-winner for my family and given the job of handling all my mother’s extremely unprepared and disorganized affairs. like i don’t have to just deal with my own shit, but i have to worry about everybody else’s shit now too. i grew up overnight, i mean im 24 and should be pretty grown despite all of this, but i don’t feel 24.. i feel 34. just blah and blank and maybe this is me coping?
i want to make brownies. home all alone tonight so i just may need to get my bake on.
-Tyler Knott Gregson-
"perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see life with a clearer view again."
crawling in the dark..
show me what it’s for, make me understand it
i’ve been crawling in the dark looking for the answer
is there something more than what i’ve been handed?
christina perri - the lonely
“..the loneliness will stay with me and hold me til i fall asleep..”0 plays